Be strong

Another week just passed. I felt really excited last friday because I got a better change for my study. Well, I wanted to improve my study and to be more hard working on my study, so I could possibly achive more and more. I feel that I can refresh my memories again. I used to put myself really hard to achive the best one in study and life. Unlike the time at home, I lost my effort when I stayed in canada alone. I feel so sorry about my last 3 years. I don't know how can I explain to my mom and dad. I love them so much, so I can't break their believes and hopes. I know my loneliness could make them heartless and painful, but I know to keep my feeling inside. Since last birthday, I realized that I feel sympathized with my mom and dad. Also, I feel forgive my selfishness because I used to believe that my mom and dad were too heartless to leave me alone. Finally, I know the true reason, and I love my parents more and more. I know that I was living alone when I was too young to learn the new world. However, I felt I have learned much experiments in life than in study. Now, I feel ready for my study. I hope that I can make my desire be true..... Day and nights, one thing I want YOU to know that I love and miss YOU than I can say. God bless you!

^^

well,

Another week just passed, I'm sitting on my chair and typing a journal. Today is a gloomy day, but it isn't cold as yesterday. I just ask what I have to do for my weekend. Let see.... I have to go out with Brandy for visting Ice Gallery in the winter festival. After that, I have to go video store to pick up DVDs . Then, what am I going to do next? well....

Until now, I feel that my life is not bad at all. I have activities to enjoy. I recieved many comments for my study. I can swear that I have miss those important things for a long time. I missed all my dad 's comments and advises. I missed a gentle speaking of my mom. I missed all giggles and laughs of my sisters. Today I felt like everything just returned and surounded. Even though I missed my family so much, I'd rather to keep it inside than to share it.

My mom said that I grew up as a girl, but I felt that I prefer the tom-boy's way. I had never known about romance like poems, love novel, romantic movie.... Now, I wonder why my style has changed a lot. I still remember I love to immitate my dad and to be strong and smart like him. I love science because my dad loves it. I always and always want to be a teacher like him. All my memory about my dad are still in my heart. I used to oppose my dad because I want to prove to my dad my right opinions. I used to hate my dad because he didn't allow me to enjoy my favorites. I love to paint, write poem and story, and play music. I have dream about that so much. I recieved many cheering words from my uncles and my friends about my poem, storied, paiting, or handmade adornments. Nevertheless, that wasn't enough because I wanted my dad look at me and share with me just once time. Until now, I still wonder why my dad did that. My dad is good at science as well as art. His poems, paintings were very sprititful. He plays music so beautiful. I was jealous because I have never shared my feeling with him.

Well, maybe my dad has his own reason to grow me up. In some how, I know that I feel weak when I follow a poetic thinking. I think that's the reason. I hope I can combine my logical thinking and poetic thinking as well. I feel now I have so much emontion to show because I hide it so long.

The shiny day is there. I will do it well... once day I will show my dad that I can success in both ways.

I miss YOU all...

somedays you will know.....

well,
Another week just passed, I'm sitting on my chair and typing a journal. Today is a gloomy day, but it isn't cold as yesterday. I just ask what I have to do for my weekend. Let see.... I have to go out with Brandy for visting Ice Gallery in the winter festival. After that, I have to go video store to pick up DVDs . Then, what am I going to do next? well....

Until now, I feel that my life is not bad at all. I have activities to enjoy. I recieved many comments for my study. I can swear that I have missed those important things for a long time. I missed all my dad 's comments and advices. I missed a gentle speaking of my mom. I missed all giggles and laughs of my sisters. Today I felt like everything just returned and surounded. Even though I missed my family so much, I'd rather to keep it inside than to share it.
My mom said that I grew up as a girl, but I felt that I prefer the tom-boy's way. I had never known about romance like poems, love novel, romantic movie.... Now, I wonder why my style has changed a lot. I still remember I love to immitate my dad and to be strong and smart like him. I love science because my dad loves it. I always and always want to be a teacher like him. All my memory about my dad are still in my heart. I used to oppose my dad because I want to prove to my dad my right opinions. I used to hate my dad because he didn't allow me to enjoy my favorites. I love to paint, write poem and story, and play music. I have dream about that so much. I recieved many cheering words from my uncles and my friends about my poem, storied, paiting, or handmade adornments. Nevertheless, that wasn't enough because I wanted my dad look at me and share with me just once time. Until now, I still wonder why my dad did that. My dad is good at science as well as art. His poems, paintings were very sprititful. He plays music so beautiful. I was jealous because I have never shared my feeling with him.
Well, maybe my dad has his own reason to grow me up. In some how, I know that I feel weak when I follow a poetic thinking. I think that's the reason. I hope I can combine my logical thinking and poetic thinking as well. I feel now I have so much emontion to show because I hide it so long.
The shiny day is there. I will do it well... once day I will show my dad that I can success in both ways.
I miss YOU all...

Mona Lisa's smile

As if Mona Lisa smiled, how tragic has been reached someone's heart about her? Sometimes I wonder that Mona Lisa got her true self to smile or just only a typical portrait had done for her. Life brings so much tragic and decieved. Living for your true self is so hard to decide. Life always contains so much unfaithfulness. The typical thing goes and passes as well as the typical person will follow. Sometimes it's too tough to live for self. Sometimes it's too unfair to follow duty. Obstacles has such a great bunch of craps on life's way. Luck and chances are also parts of road. Like Mona Lisa, in my memories and in heart I had found my true self as an typical girl who could be happy and smile with a warm sky surrounded. I have found that it was my dream. Life doesn't go like my way. I have learned to scarify my true self for my duty. So that's the way I have.

I used to believe that my duty is my heart. As long as I follow my heart, I will get my true achievement and my true self. Life gose with something else. On across road, I have to deciede and choose among my true self and my duty whereas I will regret about my choice forever. That nothing could save me excepts myself. I scarified my true self to continue my duty. As time, I found that I got so much hurt and depressed on the road I chose. Nothing could help me go back and change for. I have to continue my road and try to ignore my sorrow. "My sorrow will cause you sad" I dun think that these words can work on me. Definitely, I cause so much hurt when I try to share my feeling. I wish for something I dun have. I wish for something it is so easy to have. Family and house... these are so much accustomed for my mind and my heart. And now, I have found that those are very far and far meaning. I found that my soul was frozen and my heart was broken a part. I have to dig my tears inside and I have to dig my homesick inside. After those, I felt my heart is bleeding and never stop. I remind myself to be strong will and bold to face up with my duty. It seems to be such an internal tragedy.

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Hi Sue ... this is my blog. ^^ Have a good evening.

gloomy day

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